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Halloween Jokes
Why didn't Dracula get married?
He never met a nice Ghoul.
Why don't mummies take vacations?
They're afraid they'll relax and unwind.
Why did the vampire quit the baseball team?
They would only let him be BAT boy.
What is a ghost’s favorite ride?
The roller ghoster.
What do they teach in witching school?
Spelling.
What is a vampire’s favorite bank?
The blood bank.
What do you call two witches living together?
Broommates.
Where does a ghost go on vacation?
Mali-boo.
What is a witch’s favorite day of the week?
Frightday.
Why did the headless horseman go into business?
He wanted to get ahead in life.
What is a witch’s favorite game?
Hide-and-shriek.
What is Dracula’s favorite holiday?
Fangsgiving.
What is a witch’s favorite drink?
Apple spider.
What is a werewolf’s favorite holiday?
Howl-oween.
What is a witch’s favorite snack?
French frights.
What can't you give the headless horseman?
A headache.
What is a ghost’s favorite sandwich?
Boo-loney.
Who does Dracula get letters from?
His fang club.
How does a girl vampire flirt?
She bats her eyes.
What did the mother vampire say to her naughty child?
Stop being a pain in the neck!
What do ghosts chew?
Boo-ble gum.
How do you keep a werewolf from dying?
You send him to the living room.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
He had no guts.
What music do vampires love?
Bat-hoven.
What instrument do skeleton’s play?
Trom-BONE.
What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party?
A boo-tie.
What do you get when you cross a black cat with a lemon?
A sour-puss.
Who was the most famous ghost detective?
Sherlock Moans.
What do you call a ghost who gets too close to a bonfire?
A toasty ghosty.
Where did the goblin throw the football?
Over the ghoul line.
Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party?
He had no body to dance with.
What is a Mummies’ favorite type of music?
Wrap!
What tops off a witch’s ice cream sundae?
Whipped scream.
What's a ghost’s favorite dessert?
Boo-berry pie.
When does a ghost have breakfast?
In the moaning.
What do ghosts eat for dinner?
Spookgetti.
What do you call a ghost with a broken leg?
Hobbling Goblin.
What is a monster's favorite food?
Ghoul scout cookies.
What is a ghost favorite article of clothing?
Boojeans.
What does a skeleton orders at a restaurant?
Spare ribs.
What do baby ghosts wear on their feet?
Boo-ties!
When does a skeleton laugh?
When something tickles his funny bone.
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